Watch the Birdies'
No. Its nothing to do with gay porn you sick pervs.
Don't ask me why i said that. Things just pop out of my head and i say it. I'm a direct translation person. From brain comes the direct unadulterated messege from my oh-so-vocal mouth. Hence, i often give the wrong answers for delicate situations. Therefore the people who thought i looked to be the next Prime Minister since i was 10yrs old, thank your lucky stars that i have no ties with the government besides my army reservist duty. Unless you want to see this island being bonmbed back to the Afghan age then go ahead and have me elected and i'll wave fondly to you all while i'm jetting off in a private plane and headed for Jamaica with a very fat Swiss bank account of embezzled money as the bombs start falling like hail.
I dunno why i can't stop talking sometimes really. Maybe its to make up for all the words i didnt say all those years past where my parents thought i was mute and my peers thought me as some freaky kid who was goin to be most likely to go postal when he's sixteen. Well... i didnt go postal at sixteen but i did look like it at eighteen or so i was told. Maybe i find the need to get all that stored up vocabulary out of my system before i like slow down at age 50. That is if i get to reach that age. Sometimes i can't stand the silence, so i have to speak... and that often is the gibberish you sometimes hear when my mind just comes out with some obscure statement or sound.
Maybe its because I am a loner for so long that i can't bear to face the darkness of the past life i had. I've been a sorta outcast by choice in the first half of my 22yrs of existence. Don't ask why i chose to walk that path. Let's just say i have certain monsters in me that have to stay locked up within and hence i must walk a path different from others. I've gone thru and still have depression and i still wrestle with my mind on certain areas.
My craziness and almost optimistical spirit i have now is almost unlike what i'm typing now. Some might say i want sympathy or attention. Well.... in that case i might as well have done it earlier. Frankly speaking, there isn't more than a handful of people who know of my problem. Many just think i'm just being immature at times and just out of my mind. I cant explain really why i am this way. Just like how i can't explain my inability to cry or show geniuine sadness and even love.
I'm a messed up person and i admit it. I don't car what people say, they haven't been in my shoes for a day. I've drank and smoked till i've a memory problem and my reflexes are getting slower. I feel dulled, jaded and cold. I can't feel a damned thing really.
Why i am baring my soul here now i have also completely no idea. Maybe its just because i've realised that i'm not the only one. And i wanna be the person to try to be optimistic for others in m position. I'm not worthy of that role.
I just want to get certain things over with. And i guess that the first step is for me to look in the mirror and face the person who's looking back at me.
Don't ask me why i said that. Things just pop out of my head and i say it. I'm a direct translation person. From brain comes the direct unadulterated messege from my oh-so-vocal mouth. Hence, i often give the wrong answers for delicate situations. Therefore the people who thought i looked to be the next Prime Minister since i was 10yrs old, thank your lucky stars that i have no ties with the government besides my army reservist duty. Unless you want to see this island being bonmbed back to the Afghan age then go ahead and have me elected and i'll wave fondly to you all while i'm jetting off in a private plane and headed for Jamaica with a very fat Swiss bank account of embezzled money as the bombs start falling like hail.
I dunno why i can't stop talking sometimes really. Maybe its to make up for all the words i didnt say all those years past where my parents thought i was mute and my peers thought me as some freaky kid who was goin to be most likely to go postal when he's sixteen. Well... i didnt go postal at sixteen but i did look like it at eighteen or so i was told. Maybe i find the need to get all that stored up vocabulary out of my system before i like slow down at age 50. That is if i get to reach that age. Sometimes i can't stand the silence, so i have to speak... and that often is the gibberish you sometimes hear when my mind just comes out with some obscure statement or sound.
Maybe its because I am a loner for so long that i can't bear to face the darkness of the past life i had. I've been a sorta outcast by choice in the first half of my 22yrs of existence. Don't ask why i chose to walk that path. Let's just say i have certain monsters in me that have to stay locked up within and hence i must walk a path different from others. I've gone thru and still have depression and i still wrestle with my mind on certain areas.
My craziness and almost optimistical spirit i have now is almost unlike what i'm typing now. Some might say i want sympathy or attention. Well.... in that case i might as well have done it earlier. Frankly speaking, there isn't more than a handful of people who know of my problem. Many just think i'm just being immature at times and just out of my mind. I cant explain really why i am this way. Just like how i can't explain my inability to cry or show geniuine sadness and even love.
I'm a messed up person and i admit it. I don't car what people say, they haven't been in my shoes for a day. I've drank and smoked till i've a memory problem and my reflexes are getting slower. I feel dulled, jaded and cold. I can't feel a damned thing really.
Why i am baring my soul here now i have also completely no idea. Maybe its just because i've realised that i'm not the only one. And i wanna be the person to try to be optimistic for others in m position. I'm not worthy of that role.
I just want to get certain things over with. And i guess that the first step is for me to look in the mirror and face the person who's looking back at me.
posted by The Science Of IoS at 6:40:00 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home